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justin

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[21 Oct 2009|12:07am]
it has been 4 days short of a year since i last updated this thing. i miss livejournal and am pissed that facebook and twitter are taking over and distracting everyone with pictures and statuses and walls and all that other shit that is so incredibly little and exhausting. it depresses me sometimes but then i have to think that it's all about the world we live in and adjusting to it no matter what happens.

i'm almost positive i will be going to prague for all of next semester. it's kind of scary to think about even though i've wanted to go abroad ever since i got to college. the scariest thing is having to fill out the gigantic 15 page visa application all in czech amidst screenplays and dumbass assignments and all of the heavy partying i've been doing. my life has changed so much in the past five years and it all goes way too fast sometimes. five years ago i had friends who i thought i was going to spend the rest of my life with (as dumb as that sounds) but now i don't talk to any of them. in fact, i'm actually not really on speaking terms with anyone anymore except for people at USC. i really, really, really miss my old friends back at home... and actually my "old life" but everyone seems to be starting new lives now so i always end up feeling like a pathetic sap every time i think about calling them and catching up.

i don't know if i'll ever be happy if i just keep moving to different places and starting new lives. nothing is ever fluid or consistent. it's like one giant clusterfuck that keeps getting more weird and different with each year that passes and i've come to live by the theory of "well, i might as well do something crazy because my life can't get any crazier than it is now." this is why i hate screenwriting... it trains us to think that conflict will resolve itself when in reality, there are no third acts. there might be breaks from first to second but nothing ever comes full circle and resolves itself. karma or whatever the fuck they call it doesn't exist. there are just really random, fucked up changes that happen every now and then but no neat little bows to wrap everything together in the end.

blah blah blah.
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[05 Oct 2008|12:15am]
i'm really learning how to live as a loner out here. it's weird. i feel like there are no attachments and i can't tell if that's my fault or not.
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[09 Aug 2008|01:14pm]
I feel like I have become such a phony ever since I moved to LA.
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[05 Aug 2008|08:08pm]
[ mood | rejected ]

Why are there no nice guys in the world?

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[30 Jul 2008|12:17am]
CLASSES

Currently, I'm signed up for... a mandatory screenwriting class, a mandatory "acting for writers" class, a regular acting class (?), and my ceramics class (?) which was just cancelled due to low enrollment. So I have all this extra space. I am going to drop the acting class... I'm pretty sure... and minor in "American Popular Culture" or "Advertising." Or both. I have three more years ahead of me with a shit ton of space. I could probably double major but that would get in the way of partying and being youthful and shit. I also want to get on a reality show so I need to make room for that.

N E WAYS. I don't know how this happened but I am staying alone in my boss' apartment for two weeks in Hoboken which is sooooooo nice. A few blocks down is this pier where the entire Manhattan skyline is in front of me. And there are all these nice delis and gelato places. And the apartment is so quiet and he has all these movies and CDs that I've been ripping on my macbook. Although it is kind of strange living alone in his personal space. I need to start writing some good shit soon.
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[23 Jul 2008|01:14am]
It's hard to fathom sometimes how fucking stupid people are!
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July 19th, 2008 [19 Jul 2008|11:19pm]
ONE OF THESE DAYS I will stop using this online journal as a rant rag.

My life has been going pretty well. Last weekend, my boss David took me out to see the play Boeing, Boeing, and then we went to see the guy who is the lead singer of Blur/Gorillaz play in an African tribal band at Lincoln Center (I forget his actual name), and then David bought me cupcakes. I've been treated so well here and I'm going to miss living in NYC. I was thinking today that I am a definite New York person mainly because New York is a depressing, on-the-edge, real place that doesn't beat around the bush about it. Since I am kind of a recluse, the two things kind of cancel each other out to make a positive. But that doesn't really change anything for either of us, me and new york.

Soooo in the end I think Los Angeles is a good place for me. Every actual object--whether it's a breathing person, a building, a movie, or an idea--is very bubbly and smiley. Several exclamation points seem to come after every line of dialogue I have with someone and I have to remember this when I carry on conversation with those people. Maybe it's like that at every college, not just USC. From my experiences in New York, depressed and lonely people, while they do seem to have a realistic edge, aren't much fun to talk to either. I don't think I will live in either city after college, though.

Update on my internship: I have about ten rough drafts of essays done and will hopefully have fifteen by the end of the summer. What I'm aiming for is a rough draft of the whole thing before I leave. I am honestly just wanting this whole thing to be done, which isn't a good mindset to have, but the problem is basically that I'm not writing this for anyone. It's just a book I'm throwing out there at people. It's not like for a newspaper or a contest or a journal or anything.

I guess it's just a display case of everything I've written so far, which I'm perfectly okay with.
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[25 Apr 2008|03:22am]
I. can't. wait. to. move. out. of. this. apartment.
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[18 Apr 2008|03:22pm]
My entire body feels like jelly.
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[17 Apr 2008|02:10am]
[ mood | impressed ]

Today was awesome.

Jason Reitman, the oscar nominated director of JUNO, came into Ground Zero tonight for the USC improv group alumni show and ordered an oreo shake from me. He did not ask for whipped cream and did not say "thanks." But at least I affected his life in some way. Apparently Steven Spielberg was walking around campus today, too.

I need to start going to class more often. My heart is making my brain distracted.

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[11 Apr 2008|11:14pm]
http://swampfoxxx.muxtape.com
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[11 Apr 2008|03:57pm]
I AM (STILL) WRITING A FIVE PAGE PAPER RIGHT NOW ABOUT NOTHING.
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[05 Apr 2008|02:41am]
SUP most depressing night of my life.... oh my god
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Stupid Ass Drama and People Who Play The Victim [03 Apr 2008|04:11pm]
I am not a fan.
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[03 Apr 2008|01:48am]
JESUS CHRIST WAH T THAT F*** IS GOING TO HAPPEN

BY THE WAY, IF YOU GOOGLE "I SEE A SHIP IN THE HARBOR" ON GOOGLE, THE FIRST THING THAT COMES UP IS AN ARTICLE FROM THE ISLAND PACKET. WTF WTF WTF. WHAT ARE THE CHANCES OF THAT.....
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[03 Apr 2008|01:30am]
[ mood | loved ]

i just posted again be cause i wanted to change my mood.

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[03 Apr 2008|01:17am]
[ mood | busy ]

THIS IS SO SAD. I DON'T GIVE A S*** ABOUT MY CLASSES ANY MORE. I DON'T GO TO THAT S***. I SKIP IT. ALL I CARE ABOUT IS FRIDAYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I JUST WANT IT TO HAPPEN RIGHT NOW. I'M SORRY BUT I JUST HAVE TO GET THAT OUT THERE. I AM SO GIDDY AND IT'S BEEN BUILDING FOR SO LONG AND I AM JUST SOOOOOOOO ON THE BRINK OF BEING TOTALLY HAPPY AND CHEERFUL AND S***. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. O M G. I AM WRITING AN ESSSSSSSSAY RIGHT NOW ABOUT MY LIFE EXPERIENCES WITH JESUS. I THINK IT SUX CUZ IM WRITNG IT DRUNK. BUT I FLIP THE F*** OUT WHEN I TRY TO WRITE SOBER. IT'S 1;20 1;20 1;20 1;20 1;20 1;20 1;20 1;20 1;20 1;20 1;20 1;20 1;20 1;20 ;102; 102; 102; 1;20 1;20 ;120 120 1;20 1;20 1; 20 1;20 1;20 1;20 1;20 1;20 1;20 1;20 1;20 ;120 1;21 1;21 1;21 1;21 1;21 ;121 1;21 1;21!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ALALALALALALALALALALLALALALLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALALALAL AL ALA LALALALAL ALAL

WHY AM I PROCRASITNATION. TIME TO WORK I ONLY HAVE FOUR [PAGES. I NEED AT THE VERY LEAST 10. OMG I CAN'T DO THIS. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. SOSOSOSOSOSOSOSOSOSOSOSO SO
SO SO SO S SOSOSOSOO SOS OS SO SOS SO OSOSO. I SEE A SHIP IN THE HARBOR. I CAN AND SHALL OBEY.

HOW DOES IT FEEL. TELL ME NOW HOW DOES IT FEEL. TUH TUH TUHDUH TUH TADADADA TAT.

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[01 Apr 2008|04:29pm]
I honestly can't believe I wrote an entry here that said the film school wasn't competitive. The film school is all competition. Like it's not even fun any more. Everyone thinks they're the best so they just don't even comment on anyone else's work. That's why it seems like everyone is treated the same. I AM SO EXHAUSTED WITH THIS. I just want to seclude myself somewhere and write on my own without having the fear that someone is going to "beat" me. Fuckkkkk that. People get such a kick out of ripping on other people. That's why no one seems to get along, either...
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[31 Mar 2008|03:58pm]
So my screenwriting professor next year is the guy who wrote Cocoon, the movie about senior citizens who find magical eggs in their pool which makes them youthful. Speaking of that class, I am supposed to write an entire feature length script then. ?!?!?!?!
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[29 Mar 2008|10:38pm]
Sometimes I don't know why I live here. It just doesn't make any sense.
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